self portrait copy 2

To hell with it

  Are you here by accident? People read bios nowadays? To make this page worth your while,   instead of the usual blarg, I’ve installed a quiz . Sharpen your wit!


1) Madison has many skills and experiences. Some are, and have included: ( Check all that apply )

A) Playing trombone in a disco band

B) Locking self out of the house in  dripping full wetsuit with longboard in tow

C) Being a consummate professional

D) Knowing what ‘consummate’ means

E) Setting noodles on fire while boiling them

2) True or False?! Additional certifications and qualifications include or have included:

A) Certification in canine massage

B) Pilot’s license for single engine aircraft, tailwheel

C) Master’s degree in steamboat history

D) Dishonorable mention in the Bulwer-Litton bad fiction contest

3) Reading comprehension time! True or False, all answers can be found on this website:

A) Madison has been hucked around like a tumbleweed in a hurricane

B) Getting blasted by weather phenomena is preferable to attempting computer-based graphics. Or computer-based anything, really

C) Madison’s SAT scores were remarkable

D) Chalkboard is  a great surface for chalk

E) The best pies come from eastern seaboards

F) Taking her actual accomplishments seriously is not Madison’s forte

4) Define the following; WHAT IS A BLOOP?!

A BLOOP is _________________________________________________________________________


ANSWERS ( don’t peek!! ) 
1) All TRUE but C!
2) Again, all true but C! Go tailwheel aircraft, woot woot!
3) A) True. B) Oh hell yes true. C) TRICK QUESTION!  Considering your point of view, they may or may not be remarkable. In two attempts my scores fluctuated by 200 points with no pattern whatsoever. Once I did better at the math, and once I did better at the english section. ” We don’t know what to do with you, “ an exasperated professor once blurted out. “ You’d best learn on your own, “ a Stanford neuropsych quipped after his testing. To aid the sanity of teachers everywhere I’ve steered clear of structured formal education since ‘93.  FALSE! Chalkboard is too smooth!  E) FALSE! It’s Pies of the WEST, not the east! F) This one should be obvious.
4) You don’t know what a BLOOP is?! Ack! It is none less than the meaning of life. Go find the answer, then get outside and bloop yourself!